Confession time: I'm having a bit of anxiety and mixed feelings about the whole thing, actually. Up until now, I've been super excited to get back to Arizona, to be near our families and to have some sense of normalcy in our lives again. I was having a conversation with someone the other day and that person asked if I was happy to be moving home, and while my mouth said, "Yes," for the first time ever, my heart was saying, "I don't really know." For the past three years, California has been our "home." We've made life-long friendships with people that have become our "family" while we've been here at school. We've become really comfortable here and have always known what is going to happen next, what to expect. At this point, there are so many unknowns out there. The lack of control of the future really freaks me out!! Matt and I had a long talk (and I had a good cry) last night after we got in bed (there's that pillow talk!) and I felt so much better this morning, so much happier, just by talking about my worries with my husband. I truly believe that the Lord is aware of me and my family and will guide us with His hand through what lies ahead. I just have to put my trust and faith in Him that everything will work out the way it's supposed to. *sigh*
Sunday, August 12, 2007
One down, three to go!
Well, Matt finished his first rotation on Saturday!!!!!! I'm SO glad that he'll be close to home for his next rotation, here at the school. He does have some really late nights, though, so I don't know if it'll be much better.... But, we're happy to have the Barneys back in town! Yay! :) I can't believe that we're flying through the fourth year already! In 2 1/2 months we'll be heading back to AZ for GOOD! Matt's last two rotations are in Sacaton and Casa Grande.
Confession time: I'm having a bit of anxiety and mixed feelings about the whole thing, actually. Up until now, I've been super excited to get back to Arizona, to be near our families and to have some sense of normalcy in our lives again. I was having a conversation with someone the other day and that person asked if I was happy to be moving home, and while my mouth said, "Yes," for the first time ever, my heart was saying, "I don't really know." For the past three years, California has been our "home." We've made life-long friendships with people that have become our "family" while we've been here at school. We've become really comfortable here and have always known what is going to happen next, what to expect. At this point, there are so many unknowns out there. The lack of control of the future really freaks me out!! Matt and I had a long talk (and I had a good cry) last night after we got in bed (there's that pillow talk!) and I felt so much better this morning, so much happier, just by talking about my worries with my husband. I truly believe that the Lord is aware of me and my family and will guide us with His hand through what lies ahead. I just have to put my trust and faith in Him that everything will work out the way it's supposed to. *sigh*
Confession time: I'm having a bit of anxiety and mixed feelings about the whole thing, actually. Up until now, I've been super excited to get back to Arizona, to be near our families and to have some sense of normalcy in our lives again. I was having a conversation with someone the other day and that person asked if I was happy to be moving home, and while my mouth said, "Yes," for the first time ever, my heart was saying, "I don't really know." For the past three years, California has been our "home." We've made life-long friendships with people that have become our "family" while we've been here at school. We've become really comfortable here and have always known what is going to happen next, what to expect. At this point, there are so many unknowns out there. The lack of control of the future really freaks me out!! Matt and I had a long talk (and I had a good cry) last night after we got in bed (there's that pillow talk!) and I felt so much better this morning, so much happier, just by talking about my worries with my husband. I truly believe that the Lord is aware of me and my family and will guide us with His hand through what lies ahead. I just have to put my trust and faith in Him that everything will work out the way it's supposed to. *sigh*
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7 comments:
it was hard leaving here to go to cali and im sure it will be just as hard leaving cali to come back here! you have so much to look forward to though...a brand new house, old friends to see, family, an actual job that pays you instead of you paying them : ) so exciting! im looking forward to having another friend close by. also, i was at tillys the other day and saw madelyn from softball there. you know her, she had the twin boys...well, she was prego again! her boys are like 7? so crazy.
This blog mirrors so many of the same feelings that I have had lately. I never thought that I would miss much of California and this first rotation has really made me realize how much of California that I miss. I can't wait to see get back and see you!
also, remember red head lynda from softball? what happened to her? she works at target close by here and she is way different. i think i remember her getting into a car accident and almost dying or something? she almost seemed a little bit handicapped?
i've decided change is always hard no matter the goods and/or bads that come about from it. i'm sure once you're back here and you hang out with me, you'll forget all about cali. HA! j/k i haven't lived in california for about 14-15 years and i still go back at least a few times a year to visit and lately i've been really wanting to live there. but like you said, the LORD is aware of us and all things will work out! :)
Ohhh, I got tears in my eyes when I read this! I have been feeling the exact same way! So many mixed feelings and worries and excitement all rolled ito one. I can't believe how fast the time has gone and how many good friends we have made here . . . we'll have to always keep in touch and have reunions! Love ya!
Ditto.
I'm going to miss all you big, bad fourth years! It's been so fun... I'm so grateful that we have had such a great group to associate with. Keeping in touch will be a MUST!
I'm not really in the Optometry world, but I can certainly relate to the changes that come with saying goodbye to good friends and moving into a new chapter in your life. Your last words though about talking with your husband and the Lord being mindful is the sweet feeling the Holy Ghost has brought to me time and time again whenever I feel uncertain. What a wonderful feeling to have!
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